The Medusa Affect

Can't type

Must breathe

I must confess that I skipped yesterday's workout.  But I AM NOT SORRY!  I needed it.  I can skip whenever I want.  I am over 18.  I don't answer to anyone but God and me, and God said give it a rest (see Genesis 2:2).  So, there, Smellian Michaels.  

Today, started day one of ten for cycle 2.  All I can say is "holy crap".

Do you remember the mythical creature, Medusa?   She had a seductive voice that coaxed people to look in her direction.  She  dripped with sweetness, luring her prey like kids to candy or men to Victoria's Secret commercials ("hello, bombshell").  Oh, yeah... did I mention that she had snakes for hair and if you made eye contact with her you were turned to stone?

Jillian Michaels has a similar talent in cycle 2.  For the first minute or two I was feeling good, stretching the familiar muscles from cycle 1.  All was well until... I made eye contact with her.  Her laser beams shot out from her eyes and scanned my entire body, head to toe, looking for muscles to punish.  You see, cycle 1 was just the bait to get us into the lair.  After the laser scanner (the same kind they use at the airport - the kind that exposes your every dimple), Medusa Michaels targets the weakest muscles in our bodies and pierces us with the venom of torturous evils disguised as "exercise".  Don't eat the apple, Snow White!  Stay away from the spindle, Sleeping Beauty!  Don't go into the castle, Shrek and Donkey!  

Tomorrow is a new day, and I will do my best to get back on the exercise wagon for another gut busting, bone bruising, heart pounding round of muscle misery.  But, I think I will keep my back to the screen... just in case.